The Frequently Asked Questions: Sixers Playoff Preview

That definitely didn't end well. From what seemed like it would be a season that could end with 45+ wins as recently as three weeks ago, the Sixers limped to the finish and ended with the definition of mediocrity, 41-41. Part of that had to do with the mounting injuries (Andre Iguodala’s knee and Lou Williams’ hamstring) and part if it had to do with bad basketball, especially on the defensive end (in the first quarter against Orlando Monday night, the defense was so bad the Magic could have intentionally attempted to get contested shots and ended up with a wide-open three).

But a shaky finish does nothing to diminish what was a fantastic rebirth. The Sixers got back to playing basketball, not the horrid permutation they displayed when Eddie Jordan was coaching. It was the true epitome of team play, with no single player averaging more than 15.1 ppg. They raised their play on defense, centered around Iguodala’s growth into a top-3 perimeter defender, to become a top-10 defensive team. The team recovered from a dreadful 2009-10 to become a fun and enjoyable team to watch this season.

But the warm and fuzzy feelings go out the door when the playoffs roll around, especially when the most overhyped 58 win team in history (they had a whole website, with three quality writers, following their every move. And they don’t even have fans who care about the team! The injustices of the world) waiting for you in the second round. And, of course, there’s nothing better for looking back on a good season and prepare you for the intensity of the playoffs than my favorite gimmick, the Frequently Asked Questions.

Was it a mistake for the Sixers to make the playoffs?

Thaddeus Young is the most important Sixers player in
the series against Miami.

Conventional NBA wisdom states that a team like the Sixers, without an established star and in a bad cap situation, can’t get stuck in the cycle of mediocrity: continuing to make the playoffs as a lower seed, taking a beating in the first round, getting a middling draft pick that only helps to maintain the current mediocrity instead of improve it, leaving you to repeat the same cycle all over again. What you need to do, convention holds, is completely bottom out, hope for a top-3 draft pick, and hope that the draft has the franchise savior in it (the Howard, Rose, Durant type). Otherwise, you’ll never make it to a level where you can compete for championships, because you’ll never have a superstar and without a superstar, you don’t stand a chance in the NBA’s star-driven system.

That ‘wisdom’ is directed at teams exactly like the Sixers: they have no star, they have no cap space and they have no chance of winning the championship this year. By that standard, making the playoffs really isn’t going to help the team in the long run, right?

But what that wisdom doesn’t account for is the experience that being in the playoffs brings. Do you think Derrick Rose benefited from battling Boston and LeBron’s Cavs in two consecutive first rounds? Locking heads with great teams is the best way to get the players you have playing better. They experience real NBA basketball, contrary to what you believe happens in the regular season. In the playoffs, the intensity rises, the pressure grows and players fight and claw for everything. Nothing is easy.

NBA Preview FAQ

Have you ever had one of those sports weekends, where at least three of your teams play and they all lose? Were they important games? No, that hasn’t happened to you?

Well, then you can take solace in my pain, as I just encountered the worst sports weekend ever.

To recap:

1. My beloved Northwestern Wildcats held a 17-0 lead over undefeated Michigan State at home, on homecoming. It was glorious, especially considering there is no team I hate more in the Big 10 than Michigan State (which makes turning their cheer “Go Green, Go White” into the highly offensive “Can’t Read, Can’t write” even sweeter). But a fumble at the goaline, a crazy fourth and 11 conversion on a fake punt by Michigan State, and Northwestern QB Dan Persa (who didn’t have a game where he completed less than 73% of his passes until Saturday) doing his best (it pains me to say) Donovan McNabb impression on our two last drives, and all of a sudden the ‘Cats lost 35-27. And yes, it seemed like it happened that fast.

2. Ryan Howard, for the love of God, swing the bat.

3. The Eagles secondary decided to make Kenny Brit look like a cross of Jerry Rice and Randy Moss, Kevin Kolb decided he didn’t want a quarterback controversy and Kerry Collins lead the Titans to a blowout victory (seriously though, Kerry Collins? The only reason he’s still in the league is because he needed one more paycheck. And you lose? Pathetic).

What is the point of me telling you this story. Well because you are my six loyal readers and I needed someone to vent to. Oh, and that I couldn’t be more ready to get into the most compelling NBA season ever. I need something to take my mind off of the horrendous end to the Phillies, Northwestern and Kolb seasons. I now realize that it’s more fun to watch sports when don’t have a team, or as it’s more commonly known, being a 76ers fan.

Will the Axis of Evil reign supreme?

It’s time for the Frequently Asked Questions.

Is there any reason to optimistic about the Sixers this season?
To answer this with a question: Would you be optimistic about a team with the worst frontline since the Puerto Rican national team, a second overall pick who has yet to show any discernable skills yet, a “best player” who was the 16th option on offense at the FIBA World Championships, a coach who hasn’t been to the playoffs since 1997, and Elton Brand still collecting eight-figure pay checks?

Most of these things we already knew: Marressee Speights is the Sixers best big man, Andre Iguodala is a third banana on any half-decent team, Doug Collins is not the long term solution at coach and Elton Brand is the basketball equivalent of Jason Peters.

But the major issue comes with Evan Turner, the second pick who was considered a sure thing. I want to avoid being the typical Philly fan who overreacts to every misstep and calls for everyone’s firing and benching at the first sign of trouble….but: 1. Turner was horrendous in summer league. There is no other way to put it. 2. His preseason line is as follows: 29 MPG, 7.7 PPG, 5.9 RPG, 3.7 APG, 2.2 TO, 31%. The only reason this is remotely concerning is 3. DeMarcus Cousins’ preseason line: 25 MPG, 14.3 PPG, 8 RPG with 3 offensive boards per, on 40% shooting.

The day of the draft lottery, when the Sixers secured the second overall pick, I was double rainbow happy, knowing that Evan Turner was waiting in the wings. Minutes before the draft started, I was making statements that Cousins’ would be the best player to come out of the draft this year, barring any future admittance to the insane asylum.

A lot of it has to do with Cousins: when is the last time you saw a rookie big man with his footwork, rebounding prowess and touch around the rim? But then there’s also Turner, who as I started re-watching some of his play, looked a step too slow to be an NBA swingman, has no range three-point range whatsoever (he’s attempted no threes in the preseason while Cousins is 3-4 from distance), was turnover prone and can only play with the ball in his hands.

I am now legitimately afraid of how Cousins may haunt our franchise. If he doesn’t go Sprewell on Paul Westphal, I am convinced that he will be a 22-13 guy in three years as he and Tyreke Evans battle Kevin Durant for the Western Conference crown. I’m going to have nightmares about his drop-steps as Turner throws up mediocre 13, 5 and 5’s for the next few years.

I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.

What’s the most underrated story going into the season?
It might be just me, but Allen Iverson having to sign in Turkey is the most depressing basketball story I’ve heard since MJ decided to return with the Wizards.

Does anyone remember that it was Iverson that bridged the gap between Jordan’s first retirement or that he was the most popular player, by far, before Kobe’s resurgence post-Colorado, or that he was the only reason almost everyone you knew had Reebok’s, or that he was one of the top 5 unique players ever, or that he was the most fearless player ever, or that he was the fastest with the ball in his hands than any player ever?

Now he has to go to Turkey and play against ‘C’ competition for one last pay check? I feel like my childhood was a lie.

Can Kevin Durant and the Oklahoma City Thunder live up to expectations?
Kevin Durant is expected to be somewhere between Larry Bird, Michael Jordan, Mother Theresa and Abraham Lincoln. So, yes.

But in all seriousness, there is so much expected of the Thunder and Durant in particular, it’s almost impossible for them to meet expectations (a lot of people have them second in the West and those really concerned about Kobe’s knee have them in the Finals). But still, if you temper expectations, just reasonably, you will see that the Thunder and Durant have an unbelievably bright future.

The things they have in their favor: Durant and Russell Westbrook were the two best players on Team USA in the summer, hands down, Scotty Brooks is a really good coach, Sam Presti is smarter than your GM, and Serge Ibaka is better than you think.

Things not in their favor: They are really young dealing with expectations for the first time (usually ends poorly), Jeff Green, Thabo Sefalosha’s offense, and every big man not named Serge Ibaka.

I think they have more things in their favor than not, the only thing really concerning me is the lofty expectations. But Kevin Durant will finish in the top 2 in MVP voting again, probably lead the league in scoring and throw up crazy silly numbers. The Thunder will be in the top half of the Western Conference, win 50+ games, Westbrook will breakout even more than he did last year and get at least to the second round of the playoffs. Just remember that their best players are all under 25. Let’s not get carried away too quickly.

But we still need to be legitimately concerned about the expectations and pressures we put on Durant. We just got done witnessing LeBron not be who we wanted him to be (more on this later) this summer, not to mention the way we’ve torn down Kobe, Iverson, Bonds, Tiger among countless other athletes for all different reasons. I think we need to realize that athletes can’t always be what we want them to be. Durant might be super humble, loyal and respectful, but then again he might not. We’ve thought these things before. So while it’s great that we ascribe all the behaviors to him that we all love, including me, we need to remember that’s he’s human and going to make mistakes. We just need to accept Durant and every other athlete for exactly what they are: tremendous athletes and that’s pretty much it.

Which Western Conference teams are the biggest threat to the Lakers?
I think it’s a two team race between the aforementioned Thunder and Utah Jazz (though I think the Spurs might possibly, maybe have one last gasp in them if Tiago Splitter is good) especially since the Suns decided not to resign Amare and instead use that money to create TSFF (Terrible Small Forwards Fund).

The Jazz had the best offseason of them all (so good, I could Whip My Hair to it), getting the biggest heists PG (Post-Gasol) in stealing Al Jefferson for two late first round picks. Now they have the size to compete with the Lakers up front (Boozer killed them last year. He just couldn’t get his shot off against the length) and they still have the second or third or fourth best point guard in Deron Williams (because Chris Paul is unequivocally, beyond a shadow of a doubt, Simply Lemonade vs. Tropicana better and D-Rose and Rajon Rondo are closing fast), and a great coach in Jerry Sloan. I like the Jazz.

Who’s the Sleeper Team?
Hell is about to freeze over in three…two…one: the Los Angeles Clippers.

Obviously, they are the worst franchise in professional sports, and a lot of things can be said about Donald Sterling (which I will now proceed to say: he’s a dirty cheapskate racist who doesn’t remotely care about his product) but that doesn’t change the fact that there is still a lot to like about the Clip Show.
Blake Griffin is already one of the top 5 power forwards in the league (in order Pau Gasol, Amare, Dirk, Bosh and Griffin), Eric Gordon was the third best player this summer on Team USA (for reference Danny Granger, Chauncey Billups and Tyson Chandler were tied for the worst), Chris Kaman is an all-star and Mike Dunleavy is no longer the coach, making for an infinite improvement in that department even though I couldn’t tell you who his replacement is.

What’s stopping the Clippers from winning 45ish games and making the playoffs in a down Western Conference? Well their curse that will probably lead to Blake Griffin going Shaun Livingston on us or Baron Davis deciding to show up looking he did last year, where he weighed 15 pounds less than Shaq at the start of the season.

Still, with Houston not quite there, the Suns conjuring memories of the 05-06 Knicks with all their swingman, the Nuggets in limbo with Carmelo (Denver has no choice but to trade him. Get whatever they can and move on. The last thing they need is him on national television saying “I’ve decided to take my talents to Midtown”) and the Trailblazers having chemistry problems, the bottom two spots are definitely up for grabs. If the Clippers hand the keys to Gordon and Griffin, they should snag it.

How do the playoffs shake out in each conference?
For the west, in order: Lakers, Jazz, Thunder, Mavs, Spurs, Blazers, Clippers, Nuggets (if they keep Carmelo) or Hornets.

For the east, in order: Heat, Magic, Celtics, Bulls, Bucks, Hawks, Knicks and Wizards (by the way, I expect the Wizards and Knicks to win about 35 games each. The East is that bad).

If you’re the Lakers, how concerned are you?
I’ve been saying for years that eventually, the Lakers will have a 3-5 year stretch of continual lottery appearances (and what a glorious stretch that will be) and the way Kobe has looked so far, that time is moving mighty close.

However, it’s not quite here. If the Lakers and more specifically Kobe are smart about minutes, numbers etc, hands the keys to Gasol for the regular season and he rests consistently throughout the season, kind of the way Gregg Popovich handles Duncan or Doc Rivers handles his old guys, then Kobe should have just enough juice to get back to the Finals in a weaker West and put up one more 6-24 in Game 7.

The issue lies in the years beyond that. Kobe has officially hit the Tim Duncan circa 2009 stage of his career: he’s still good, can get his numbers but in no way, shape or form can carry his team past the second round the way we’re accustomed.

That means they will have to permanently hand the keys over to Gasol, hope Andrew Bynum can put together a full season (which is truly laughable) and find some way to get the atrocious contracts off the books (which should be easy, just put in a call to Chris Wallace).

Darker days are coming for the Lakers, but that doesn’t start until 2011.

Do the Magic, Celtics or Bulls have a chance against the Heat in the East?
Only the Celtics, if healthy, have a real shot. Last time I checked, the Magic still have Vince Carter, so in big playoff moments they play 4 on 5. The Bulls are much improved (and Derrick Rose has a beastly look about him), but don’t have the wing firepower to stay with Wade or LeBron.

Leaving only the Celtics with a real shot to stop the Axis of Evil (the name I’m giving them). Even though they’ve done their best to get the 2002 All-Stars back together (seriously, Ray Allen, Paul Pierce, KG, Shaq and Jermaine O’Neal were all 2002 All-Stars), as we saw last year, they have an ace in the hole: defense.

If they can get one of the O’Neal’s to play pick and roll defense (or at the very least get Jermaine to awake from the coma he suffered in the playoffs last year), they have a shot at stopping the Heat.

The Heat don’t have anyone to matchup with Rondo, KG should be able to score on Bosh’s terrible defense and Pierce manages to give LeBron a hard time every time they play.

But you have to be concerned that Ray Allen may not have anything left, they don’t have near the athleticism to keep up in a track meet and all the years they beat Wade and LeBron, they only geared their defense to one guy, not three.

In other words, the Heat should make it to the Finals and make it pretty easily.

What about the Heat? Can it work?
The big question. Before the answer, let’s consider the factors:

1. The big offseason acquisition to complement the Axis of Evil, Mike Miller, is out for a while. It would be a big deal if his name was James, Wade or Bosh. Alas it’s not.

2. Chris Bosh has finally found his niche: open 15 jumpers created by the two best penetrators in the league. He doesn’t really have to rebound, post up or facilitate offense. His only job is to hit open looks. I maintain he’s the luckiest man in America.

3. Dwyane Wade can now only focus at what he’s really good at: finishing games. No longer does he have to worry about making sure Carlos Arroyo doesn’t blow it in the second quarter. He’s got one mentality: finish in the fourth quarter, which is scary.

4. Erik Spolestra has the most pressure on him of anyone in the organization not named LeBron. I don’t care what Pat Riley says. He’s no better than the Situation when he tries to swoop in and steal Vinny’s girl. Riles always has his eye on the job, and rumors will swirl at the first sign of trouble.

5. LeBron has a look about him that is so encouraging its scary. It was really funny when he tweeted that he was taking mental notes at the people taking shots at him but after watching the focus he’s shown in preseason, it seems like he’s serious. He finally developed a semi-post game after 4 years of people yelling at him to do so. He’s no longer loosy-goosy, taking pictures on the sideline and joking around. He’s all business. He’s Kobe on nights flying to games from Eagle, Iverson in 2001, Shaq in 2000, Jordan in 1996: on a flat out mission to shut all the doubters up. Say what you want about the decision but it has radically changed the way he operates. He’s no longer who we want him to be but exactly what he wants to be (as a really good Nike commercial with a not to veiled shot at Barkley shows). I think he’s finally got it. And all it took was him completely destroying his popularity. He could honestly throw up 22-9-11 and do it with ease.

So to answer the question, yes. I honestly hate this team with everything I got, just because of the way it came together, the way they celebrated like they already won the championship and the fact that it happened to one of the worst fan bases in sports. But this looks like it’s going to work. Everyone seems to accept their role. They are going to out athlete everyone. And it’s going to see all that talent on the floor at once will be amazing to watch.

It pains me to say but they are the best team in the league.

Who will win the major awards?
Rookie of the Year: Blake Griffin. Easiest award to pick if he stays healthy. He’s freaky even though John Wall will be really good.
Coach of the Year: Jerry Sloan. He’s just due.
Defensive Player: Dwight Howard. If he doesn’t win this award, we can stop mentioning him like he’s a top player right?
Most Improved: Jrue Holliday. The lone bright spot on a barren 76ers roster will rack up easy numbers
6th man: Jamal Crawford: He’ll win the backhanded compliment award for the second straight year
MVP: LeBron: It’s almost crazy how because of the summer, we forgot that this guy is still the best player on the planet. Just because he joined the Heat doesn’t mean that he’ll suck. He’s finally playing with good teammates. As much as I love Durant, LeBron is on a mission like he’s never been before.

Finals Pick
Miami over Lakers in 7

Game 7 will be played in Miami. The fair weather fans will decide that it’s an important enough game to go to. Kobe might shoot 5-24 in this game. Ron Artest will take that same three he made last year, only this time it will do what it’s supposed to and get sucked into Rick Ross’ fat orbit. Wade will close like he did when he won Finals MVP. LeBron’s decision will prove to be correct.

The reign of terror is set to begin.

NBA Free Agency 2010: Frequently Asked Questions

The ESPN hype machine broke out in full force for nearly two years in anticipation of the most talented free-agent class in the history of professional basketball.  Dwyane Wade and LeBron James were the headliners.  Chris Bosh was tabbed as the superwingman (but please don’t put him on James; or Wade’s level).  Amare Stoudemire, Carlos Boozer and David Lee rounded out a class of talented but flawed big men.  Joe Johnson and Rudy Gay were the other wing guys who did just enough to not excite you.  It was truly a sight to behold.

We should have expected that something crazy would happen.  Obviously, the decisions that these players made could shift the balance of power in the league for the next 5-10 years.  The future of the league was up for grabs.

We should have expected that some variation of the history of NBA free agency would play out.  GMs would make predictably dumb trades and handout outrageous contracts to players with enough red flags you would think Marvin Lewis was trying to challenge.  We should have expected that player’s egos would get in the way.  We should have expected that something would happen that would make us say: “Wow, that’s surprising.”

What we got instead was something that made us say: “HOLY MOTHER OF CLUSTERF**K”

The landscape of the NBA has completely changed.  We now have a superteam brewing on South Beach.  The legacies of so many players are now forever altered.  What has happened is completely unprecedented.   Basketball as we knew it is gone.  

To sort through it all, we have to make a Free Agency 2010: The FAQ.

Who was the Biggest Winner of Free Agency 2010?
Dwyane Wade.  And it’s not even close.  Wade was able to convince LeBron James, the guy with the potential to be the greatest player ever, to come with him to Miami and be his Scottie Pippen.  It’s one of the biggest upsets, and biggest heists, in the history of sports.

But beyond his John Calipari recruiting ability, this has major implications for his legacy.  He’s spent the last few years with a supporting cast that makes the 2001 Sixers look like Team USA.  His most consistent teammate since he won the title has been Udonis Haslem (ouch).  He’s had to deal with Skip to my Turnover, Carlos Arroyo, Jermaine O’neal’s corpse, Michael Take it Easy, Dorrell Wright, Chris Quinn, Mark Blount, Joel Anthony and the crap could continue forever.

Now?  He’s added top 25 player of all-time to his potential resting place in NBA lure.  He already threw up the best Finals performance by a guard since Jordan when he (with the help of the second best player in the league that year, Bennett Salvatore) carried the Heat on his back to a championship.  After two injury filled years after that, he’s finally recaptured that championship form, throwing up stupid-silly numbers (26 points, 6 assists and 5 rebounds. last year, 30, 7.5 and 5 the year before).  With the chance to hog championships for the next 7 or so years barring injuries, he could end up with five total, while being the alpha-dog on every single one.

I think that his career has had a similar trajectory to Kobe: very early success, a mid-20s lull and now the opportunity to spend their primes in serious contention for championships.

If he can dutifully put up 25, 5 and 5, and end up with 4 total titles or more, you could conceivably be looking at a top-15 player of all-time.

Sounds like a winner to me.

Who was the Loser of Free Agency 2010?
I’m sorry Cleveland.  You guys have become the bizzaro version of that very annoying DJ Khaled song.

Who had the most underrated offseason move?
The Lakers signing Steve Blake to four years, $16 million, in the rare “team filling a need with a player who fits their system with a fair contract” move, something Minnesota GM David Kahn never wants to do.  The things Blake does on the floor fit perfectly with what the Lakers need him to do.  He’s played with a guy like Kobe in Brandon Roy, so he understands how to play point without the ball, he’s not a guy prone to take bad shots, he makes open ones out to the three-line.  He looks like a guy who would fit well in the triangle.  He can come off the bench or start.  He’s exactly what they needed.  You know the NBA is in bad shape when you have to commend a team for ACTUALLY filling needs with good players.

Who had the worst offseason move?
I thought watching last offseason’s Detroit debacle was bad (over $90 million for two bench players), but this was patently worse.  Joe Johnson made the most money this offseason for back-to-back playoff no-shows.  Darko got $20 million for having David Kahn as his GM.  Amir Johnson got $34 million, even though Amir Johnson has done nothing notable ever in the NBA.  Travis Outlaw got $35 million.  Drew Gooden got $32 million.  Brendan Haywood made $55 million for having one solid season in a contract year (Dallas apparently forgot their own mistake, because they did the same thing with Erick Dampier).  Rudy Gay got a max contract.  It doesn’t stop.

It’s like teams don’t learn lessons from previous years.  In the same offseason, the Sixers gave $80+ contracts to Andre Iguodala and Elton Brand, two guys who can’t be your best player on a championship team, but they definitely could play a role.  How’s that working out for Philly?  27 wins last year.  If you pay a non-alpha dog, alpha-dog money, you are going to suck and suck for a long time

The worse move has to be a tie between every time David Kahn walks into the office and the Johnson contract.  Kahn made the afformentioned Darko signing, signed some second round pick no one has ever heard of to a $13 million deal, traded for Michael Beasley just to give Miami more cap room while adding another undersized power forward who can’t defend to further his quest of having the most undersized front line of guys who can’t defend in NBA history.  Oh, and he dealt a top-three low post scorer, for nothing, to a team desperately needing a low-post scorer.

Then, there was Johnson, who bless his heart, isn’t a number one guy nor is he a number two guy.  And they gave him $120+ million dollars.  On offense, he’s a midrange jumpshooter who doesn’t get to the rim or the line.  He has no athleticism, can’t be a playmaker for others, and a below-average defender.  And did I mention that in back-to-back years he no-showed in all four of his team’s playoff series as their best player.  Atlanta was apparently following the little known rule that you have to resign a player to a massive contract after consecutive playoff choke jobs.  It’s in the CBA (See: McGrady, Tracy).

(Sidenote: the league is in real trouble.  Even with a lockout looming because of contracts exactly like the ones given out this summer, they are still handed out.  It doesn’t even matter if they radically change the salary cap structure, limit contracts amount and length.  As long as there are frustratingly incompetent general managers, and they currently make-up at least half the league, they will always handout cap-crippling contracts, leaving there to only be 5 contenders max.  The only way this gets fixed is if David Stern personally negotiates contracts himself.  And I wouldn’t rule it out).

Hey, it’s LeBron’s Ego and I’m wondering why you haven’t asked a LBJ question yet?
No comment.

Is there anything positive to take away if I’m a Knicks, Bulls or Nets fan?
If you’re a Bulls fan, you’re great shape.  If you’re a Nets fan, you’re in so-so shape.  If you’re a Knicks fan, find Donnie Walsh and throw him into the Hudson River.

The Bulls maintained their flexibility for next summer, added a low post presence in Carlos Boozer, signed sharpshooter Kyle Korver and still have Luol Deng as a trade chip, and they could get J.J. Redick (J.J. is underrated.  He’s a fantastic shooter, better than you think defender, smart, and better than Vince Carter).  The only negative is that Carlos Boozer, while productive now, isn’t a guy who can be the best player on a title team and could be Elton Brand in 3 years: undersized with no vertical who gets swallowed up by height routinely.

The Nets got a little anxious before LeEgo signed, inking Travis Outlaw to a $35 million contract.  But they still have a ton of cap flexibility for the future.  And they have that big billboard right next door to MSG (awesome to see in person).  And they have the most interesting man in the world as their owner.

The Knicks are boned.  Absolutely and completely boned.  They sold away every asset for two straight years for this summer.  They have given up 4 trillion draft picks.  They dumped contract after contract for 11 cents on the dollar.  And all they came away with was Amare Stoudemire.  Ouch.

I like Amare (I actually really like him) but if he’s your best player, all those draft picks you traded away are going to be in the lottery.  They don’t have a point guard, center, bench or anything else besides Amare and kinda Danilo Gallinari and Wilson Chandler.  Because when I give away anyone and everything for 20 percent of their value, I want my team to be led by Chandler, Gallinari and Stoudemire.

Donnie Walsh completely screwed this up.  He geared everything for two years toward this summer, left the cupboard more naked than Eddy Curry, and put all of his eggs in the LeBron/Wade basket.  Obviously that didn’t work.

He didn’t hedge any of his bets.  Instead, he’s already gearing things toward free agency next year (possibly Carmelo) and the year after (possibly Chris Paul), completely ignoring the way you build is through smart drafting (the San Antonio/OKC model) or hoodwinking people in one-sided trades because someone formerly tied to your organization works for another team (Boston/LA model).  

I’m glad  you still haven’t figured that out Donnie.

Which team stands to lose the most because of Miami?
Orlando.  Look, I may bag on Dwight Howard for looking awkward in the post or missing free throws, but he is a superstar.  And Miami doesn’t have anyone who can guard him.  The problem is, he doesn’t have anyone around him.  Jameer Nelson won’t get it done.  Rashard Lewis is the most expensive spot-up jumpshooter in the history of the league.  And then they have Vince Carter, a guy who would shrink in a WNBA playoff game.  It also doesn’t help that his GM is an idiot who decides that cap space is best spent on backups who play 10 minutes a game instead of trying to get a crunch time scorer.

The Magic’s best chance is to kidnap Carter, Gortat and Bass to get them off their cap and then try to convince Carmleo to try and create the best rivalry basketball has seen in 20 years.  In the unlikely event that doesn’t happen, Magic fans will be left to wonder how 2009 would have played out if Nelson would have closed out on that Derek Fisher three or Courtney Lee converted that tough alley-oop.

Is Chris Bosh the luckiest guy on the planet?
Well, put it this way.  This guy has never won a playoff series, only been to the playoffs twice, missed the playoffs in back to back seasons, has only won three career playoff games in seven seasons, while spending his entire career in the dilapidated East with enough talent around him (Jose Calderon, Andrea Bargnani etc.) to be able to at least make it to the playoffs more often than that, while not playing well in said playoff games (43% shooting, only 9 rebounds per game).

He’s a porous rebounder (only 9.4 for his career when he should be able to grab more considering Bargnani rebounds worse than Jennifer Aniston) and atrocious post defender defender (the numbers say he’s worse than Amare, although, to be fair, some that has to do with the crimes against basketball committed by the Toronto defense).

Offensively he’s talented, but limited. He’s essentially a midrange jumpshooter. Everyone likes to make the comparison to Pau Gasol, but doesn’t have nearly the passing ability or the skill and variety of low post moves.

Of course, this is conveniently not mentioned when we talk about Bosh because no one has ever seen a Raptors game (unfortunately, I have, being the poor schlep I am who still watches Sixers basketball), then all of a sudden he’s considered in the same class of player as Wade and LBJ while never having won a big game in college or the pros.

So yes, he is pretty lucky.

I have been on record as saying I would prefer to have Amare over Chris Bosh, given past playoff performances (it seems like everyone forgets that he always abused a still-in-his-prime Greatest Power Forward of All-Time routinely when the Suns and Spurs matched up) because if I’m forced to decide between no-defense power forwards, poor rebounding power forwards, at least give me the one who’s won a playoff series.

Now, does this mean that Bosh can’t develop into the quality player the perception has him being?  Absolutely not.  He’s got the talent to be one of the 10-15 best players in the league.  Gasol went through the growing pains and learning curves to get where he is.  But let’s not anoint something that hasn’t happened yet.

What does this all mean for LeBron?
There are two ways to examine everything that’s happening with LeBron: on-court and off.

On-Court: If we could consider any part of LeBron’s highly contrived, ego-maniacal move from Cleveland to Miami smart, the fit on the floor would be the only candidate.  It showed that above all, LeBron knew exactly how he fit into the basketball world.

Questions were starting to develop whether or not LeBron was really a crunch-time guy.  Every once in a while, he made you say ‘what the hell was that.’  (I really was getting nervous about how he acted in the big moments this year, especially after his duel with Carmleo when he couldn’t guard him and couldn’t make anything happen on offense and that very weird three he took against Boston late in the regular season.  Did these moments stop me from picking Cleveland?  Of course not.)

Even with those questions, we still held out hope that he was what we thought he was: a guy with an unlimited ceiling of potential and a guy who could eventually be one of the five best players ever.  At every sign of trouble, we pointed back to the flashes of brilliance that made us remember exactly why we thought what we did.

But as we saw in the Boston series, where he unequivocally quit, he couldn’t handle that pressure of all those expectations.  He didn’t have it in him to be the man.  He didn’t have the killer mentality that a Jordan or Kobe have.  He didn’t have the crunch time chops.  He didn’t have the special “it” to go with the unnatural physical gifts he possessed.

The only thing is he realized this way before we did.  He realized that he couldn’t bear the weight of a franchise, be the guy in the last four minutes who won or lost the game or withstand the blame when he eventually came up short.  He realized that his ultimate destiny was, is and will be as the greatest wingman in the history.

And in that sense, this move makes all the sense in the world.  He can have the best of both worlds: put up great stats (he’s got triple-double average potential this year), get all the glory and love from the fair-weather Miami fans (I don’t think a fan base is least dersving of what just happened to it then Miami.  Their fans haven’t trekked to American Airlines Arena in four years, but now they are selling out welcoming parties for three free agency signings?  I like to give Lakers fans crap, but they know basketball and they always fill Staples Center.  Heat fans are a joke.), but not have to deal with being the guy in the last minutes or it being his team (having transferred those responsibilities to Wade).

The sad part of the story is we did not realize this, at least not in time.  Our hope in LeBron in all that we thought he was.  But in fact, he was none of those things.  LeBron has a second fiddle mentality with alpha-dog talent.

All of this has to be factored in when we look back on his career.  Yeah, he may average a triple-double this year, while doubling as point guard for the most fascinating team since the 2004 Lakers and one of the most interesting ever.  He may have a few rings.  He may have banged some of the hottest women on the world down on South Beach.  But he never, ever, EVER deserves to be mentioned in the pantheon of basketball players.  None of the greats would ever decide that they had to go to another superstars city, watch him take all the clutch shots, just for a chance at a ring.  I imagine that Bird would have rather retired title-less, rip his eyeballs out and stick a Red Auerbach cigar up his rectum than slum his way to LA to join Magic and Kareem to win some rings.

And that’s all we really need to know.  Yes, LeBron needed help to win a title, and yes every great player has needed another top-25 player in the league at the time to win a championship.  But, that doesn’t mean LeBron should go and be the help.  You don’t go and be someone’s wingman.  And because of that, LeBron’s ceiling went from evolutionary Magic/Jordan to evolutionary Pippen (And I love Scottie).  And that’s not a good thing.

Off-Court: This whole spectacle was a bigger disaster then Transformers 2: Revenge of the Extremely Racist and Offensive Twin Robots.  And it has nothing to do with leaving Cleveland, only the way he left Cleveland.

It appears clear now, once you break down all the signs that he was leaving.  And he knew he was going to Miami, at least going back to when he lost to the Celtics.  He strung out a decision so contrived in fake drama that he’s turned an entire populace of fans against him over the course of two weeks.

I don’t want to talk about the ‘Decision’ because there is nothing I could say about the one hour that hasn’t already been said.  It was a narcissistic, ego-fest where someone thought they were more important than they actually were.

But the ramifications of such a bad decision are astounding.  LeBron is no longer adored like he once was, treated like a King or anything like that outside of Miami.  The country has unified under one movement: Down With the King.

It’s just the way he strung along Cleveland only to treat them like ragged dogs.  It’s the way he thought he is, was and always will be the greatest thing on earth.  It’s the way he quit.

I was a LeBron guy, even after the Boston series.  I was captivated watching him.  I thought he was the best guy in the league and as such, defended all of the signs described above.

Now? I hate the guy.  I want him to lose like I haven’t wanted a guy to lose before.  I hate him more than I hate Kobe.  I hate him more than I hate Glenn Beck.

Even sadder, it ends the Kobe/LeBron argument.  Kobe won.  Now, I don’t want to make Kobe about to be some hero of basketball.  We had to suffer through Kobe’s own selfishness in destroying the early 2000s Lakers, drawn out free agency courtship and repeated trade demands.  But the one thing we have to give Kobe is that he did not quit on his team and city, say it was too hard and join Tim Duncan in San Antonio.  For better or worse, Kobe wanted to be the man, wanted to be the best, and wanted to be the best.  LeBron has given me even more respect for Kobe.

And he was able that in a mere two weeks.  Even Tiger Woods thinks that pretty fast to turn a whole country against you.

The Miami Heat will be the most disliked team next year and a lot of that is LeBron.  Even so, this is the most captivated and excited I’ve been for an NBA season ever.  I want Heat season tickets and the 29 jerseys of the teams they will play just so I can root against them.  I want to see if LeBron can successfully play point guard full-time, if the Heat can actually guard someone, if Chris Bosh can step up on the big stage, if the Heat are good enough to get past the Lakers and Celtics (having only added Mike Miller, Big Z and Udonis Haslem makes me say no, at least for this year, barring other additions), if Erik Spoelstra has the coaching chops to deal with all the ego (when you have a welcome party that has the slogan “Yes. We Did It,” like they won the presidency or the very least a championship you know ego’s are raging uncontrollably).  Like it or not, this arrangement has completely changed basketball.  If it’s for better or worse has yet to be determined.